Not the results we were hoping for.

On the 6th of January, Alex had her first non-sedated MRI. We were amazed by this little five year old and how brave and strong she was. Not that we should be amazed because she is always super strong but she still manages to amaze us. Not only did she have x-rays and her cast off and reworked into a removable cast that morning but we didn't have time to grab lunch between appointments because our morning appointment ran over. She had to have an IV placed and this girl didn't even cry. She told the nurse all you have to do is take a deep breath and think about something else. She was sitting in my lap and we were watching Marco Polo videos of Aunt Be-Be and Uncle Keith on their mission trip as a distraction. Right before they stuck her she took a big breath and it was done. Everyone in the room was really proud of her. Once they had the room ready we went in for the MRI. She was able to pick out a movie to watch and they got her set up with her movie goggles and Frozen. I was able to sit in the room with her in a rocking chair. The MRI lasted an hour and a half and only once did Alex ask for something and the tech came in to check on her and fix her movie goggles so she could see better. She lay still the whole time and they didn't have to retake any of the pictures.

Alex loves to make silly faces and often when a picture is taken she wants to follow that with a silly face picture so here it is. Waiting for the MRI room to be ready.

During the scan, I rocked and prayed and watched her lying there so still and peacefully. Of course, I was praying for good results, I was praying for the disease to show that it was in remission and that the bone was strong. I was praying for a miracle. I was praying for peace and for God's will to be done. After the scan, Alex was given a coupon for ice cream in the cafeteria because she was so good. She was very excited about her prize so we went upstairs and got her some lunch and ice cream. We also found the butterfly garden and she loves to spin the wooden butterflies. This was a favorite stop while she was staying in the hospital in May.

We had some time to go outside in the garden and see the fish. During our previous stay, this area was closed for construction. We were able to watch the fish through the windows but we had not been able to go outside. She really enjoyed spending a few minutes outdoors.

Before we had even gotten home that afternoon, our oncologist, called to give the results of the MRI. I assumed when I heard her voice that it was not the results we were hoping for. They determined there was some spread both through bone and muscle from the MRI six months before. They also felt like we needed to go ahead and begin the low dose, oral chemo, while we continued to figure out the details and explore all of the options. We agreed to this plan and began the treatment. She has done fairly well on it. She has had a decreased apatite, some mild nausea, and is far more tired than she used to be. We hate that she is struggling with any side effects but thankful they are not worse. Were we praying for a miracle? Yes. Are we going to continue to pray for a miracle? Without a doubt but the beautiful thing is that no matter what happens we know that His plan for her life is perfect and our prayers are heard. Sometimes we don't get the miracle we think we are praying for because in His perfect knowledge He knows what really is best and that is what He gives.